如果有如果...

看着他一张又一张的照片
突然觉得
我错过了好多
他的曾经
很想追逐他的脚步
填补那些错过的回忆
可是
为什么我只觉得很落寞
很挫败
很惆怅
好像他离我好远好远
遥远得
连他模糊的背影
也看不见了

聽你說什麼我都很快樂
接近你連影子都微笑著
幾千隻紙鶴你都耐心地陪著我折
卻怎麼都折不掉那道無形的隔閡

越懂你陪著你就越寂寞
靈魂那麼美我卻碰不得
感覺再熾熱也不能讓飛蛾去撲火
靠近你的夢難道就能不失落

好朋友只是朋友 還是朋友 不能夠佔有
好朋友瘋狂以後 就一個人走 無所求
好朋友只是朋友 只能保留 一點點溫柔
我知道什麽時候回頭 不打擾你的自由

認識你也許我就足夠了
緣分的深淺我都不管了

可能你感動也看不見我心如刀割
哪怕很痛過 至少就不算錯過

好朋友只是朋友 還是朋友 不能夠佔有
好朋友瘋狂以後 就一個人走 無所求
好朋友只是朋友 只能保留 一點點溫柔
我知道什麽時候回頭 不打擾你的自由

愛人不是最好的朋友
朋友再好也不能牽手
感情在天平兩頭 誰都怕太沈重

好朋友只是朋友 還是朋友 不能夠佔有
好朋友瘋狂以後 還是一個人走 無所求
好朋友只是朋友 只能保留 一點點溫柔
我知道什麽時候回頭 不打擾你的自由

i've forgotten my life without you );

 

 

feel like missing you

feel like calling  you

feel like talking to you

it's like we've not been seing each other for ages

but i've just met you yesterday.

there's not much time left

i'm gonna miss you so. so. much.

 

please tell me what to do.

cause i aint sure i can live without youu♥

can you just say you miss me.

take the chance!

我不要
自己现在这个样子
为什么
不能成为像她一样
为什么她要成为我心中
害怕   渴望   耿耿于怀的对象？
在意
就要努力去改变
改变自己的处境
就不会有更多的下一次    下一次
三年了
难道我还要这样不停的讲起


是时候改变
我不要后悔
也不要妒忌
我也可以做到
一定要。

wishing upon a star (;

okayy. this blog was dead for quite a few months.

and i finally decided to refresh it (;

there was this boyy, who's frequently messing my mind

love the way he's standing in front of me, just waiting for me

love the way he smiles . he laughs. 

love the way he talks . he shouts.

if i had a wish, it'll be you(;

guess i'm just daydreaming♥

ily, yoochun (;

don't lose faith.

erhmm.
kinda addicted to korean dramas since last year, and so are the korean stars (;
here are some of my favourites♥

hyun bin (:

yoochun!!♥

李钟硕(; he reminds me of yy.

well, there are, in fact, many more.
but after all,
魏晨 and yoochun are the very best!!!♥

you were right here, just in front of my eyes (;

& i found out it's my ownself.

我的魏晨，其实一直都在♥

我不是故意要忘记，只是我真的想不起 ):

对我来说
你是神秘的存在感
是遥不可及的梦境
那种感觉
好像在远处欣赏着一座
很完美的雕像
可是雕像毕竟是雕像
怎么近距离地观看
都无法深入的了解



我一直想把你的样子
烙印在脑海中
可是无论我怎么努力的回想
出现的
只有你站在远处
缩小的背影

明明刚刚已经看见了
可是一转身
只有一层层迷雾在眼眶
你的样子
我怎么也想不起来

cheers! :D

有一种尖锐 在心里搁浅
寂寞时特别强烈
呼吸 刺痛 纠结

有一些笑脸 公式化出现
计算出快乐假面
是痊癒 还是上了麻醉

放了自己 放了回忆
放了世界不过如此而已
多少庆幸 多少风景
在放了之后才清晰
放了自己 放了回忆
放了那 配不上你的伤心
你该诠释的不再是悲剧主角的残影
而是新的自己

你有过期待 也有过等待
满腔热血只无奈
现实 报废 浪漫
人群中进行 孤单时复习
你的坚强很争气
只是怎麽学不会忘记

当那幸福的号志 又一如往常的亮起
笑着放了自己♥






昨天 考了钢琴
真的很紧张 也失了水准==
不过 考过也考过了
往前看吧(:


说真的 觉得自己有点可悲
以前 至少和yy是好朋友
现在这样， 算什么?
明明就不是很了解他
甚至谈不上是朋友
一直存有的那种感觉，
算不算是一种盲目的崇拜?

也许等到哪一天，
我会笑自己当时的傻(;

because time heals everything(:

woots.
loads of exams coming up, piano practical exam and school workk.
and i'm still here, pouring my pressure (:
i nearly cried on friday, thinking of those things that happened earlier.
everyday i woke up, the first thing that came up my mind was that-
not to mention here, it was such a sudden.
i even dreamt of them, happily ever after.
maybe it's a chance to forget, to let go and take things easier.
maybe i'll realize everything wasn't that difficult??
but it takes time.





say goodbye,
because goodbye means going away
& going away means forgetting.

nothing matters.

I keep daydreaming for these few days,
wondering how will my future be, and thinking about relationships.
seriously, I hate relationships.
why should we relate ourselves with others?
connection makes problems.




thought of joining REDDY's cheer,
but first I need my body to be flexible enough><
maybe i'm not so enthusiastic about dancing,
but i still loved the stage(:
i feel like i belong to it.

明明知道自己占有欲很强
也知道自己因此已经失去了很多
不要重蹈复撤了
再这样下去
苦的只会是自己

the fact of being a coward.

walk like you own the place
talk like you know it all
and act like no one
can make you fall-

wanna start a conversation ( is it so difficult???? )
don't runaway when you see him ( omg you're so childish )
go straight in front of him and stand still ( please don't panic )
look into his eyes and hold for at least ONE minute ( this is stupid )


well I don't think I can do this...

come on- all I want was just friends
who greet each other when they meeeeet. ><

runaway.

I need a tablespoon of courage and confidence♥

photos instead of words(:

stop being so emotional at school><

it's happening again.

yeap. I'm fully aware that she might be taking over my place*
maybe they think it's ridiculous but.
I care for it. I really care about it.
She's funny. popular ( at least, in our class ).
and the most important part is -
she's really very close with all of them.



I don't wish to repeat all the unhappy circumstances
that happened in winter camp,
so I'm trying my best to ignore HER,
which ached my feelings.
I have always been frustrated with myself,
by not knowing how to make friends..



now I've found three best ones,
and i know i'll face load of problems,
just like what's happening right now.

如果可以再重来...

我这又是怎么了?
为什么只是再靠近他一点点
那种感觉又全回来了
而且这次好强烈好强烈


如果一开始已经是个错
那我该怎么办?
是否该继续错下去
还是让事情回到当初的那个情景
我还能够拿着笔
给他签名?
事情已经快要过去一年了
我好想做个了断
只因为讨厌这样逃避他的自己


短暂的屏息
不规律的心跳
仿佛在告诉我自己
他一直都在你心里
只是你不愿意去在意
也想趁机忘记...

courage? confidence?

宜华 如果我是你
该有多好
至少你们之间的距离 只差那么一点点
怪只怪我 没有那份勇气去争取
我常自责 可是始终都不曾付出行动
为什么 我问自己
犹豫什么 害怕什么
他们都说他与别人说话的时候都没有正视别人
那我呢
我又算得了什么
如果他胆小
那我懦弱
如果他也拿出了那份勇气
我也可以吗？



从来不曾这样
胆小得连我自己都不敢想象
或许我可以耸耸肩
说声没什么
可是为什么心里还存有那么点不甘 那么点犹豫
想做就去做啊.


看着别人都嘻嘻哈哈地说着他的幽默
间接地
嘲笑了我的懦弱
如果给我一分钟
正视他的眼睛
我想心底的那份勇气
会渐渐的萌生吧.

' 想做就去做呗 '
我想克服
真的想克服...

the other way round.

back from BISDS youth camp.
I was actually quite disappointed -
it was still interesting
but last year's was awesome.
I remained silent ( as usual )
because I seriously . seriously. have no idea of making friends.
okay. maybe i have. but I hesitated.
it has always been driving me crazy.

hmm back to the main topic.
I think BMV's toilet is disgusting
but seriously. IMPIAN camp site's worse. than ever.


the obstacle course. I see.
when i fell down from the slope -
I really wanted to cry. for heaven's sake.
It was awful!

balance and conquer.
I like that. especially the game after this activity.
i don't know what it's called -
but i shivered in cold when they splashed me with water.
it was the first time i find my teeth shivering! XD

and the last. camp fire.
damn it was raining through the whole day.
so we went back to the hall instead.
I love the games and I laughed throughout the entire activity
X)

i still remembered that ' uncle ' said
" MACAM NENEK "
" SAYA CAKAP 'SAYA BOLEH' , KAMU CAKAP 'YES!YES!YES!' "
and our project with ' JUSTIN BIEBER INSPIRES '
the sketch related to cancer-
it was all so funny.


maybe it was not so dull.
I just have to learn to enjoy it.
=)

the way i hated and missed.

okayy.
boredom.
still can't believe form 2 school days are over..
everything's happening like a jolt of lightning
i just can't hold on to something.



flashback.
they're all memories.
i know form 2 wasn't an awesome one
but still.
i missed it.



2 ai.
the way we used to laugh
the way we shouted
the way we went crazy
and now.
goodbye and for all.. ;)

i missed.

i wished we were still friends
i wished everything was back to normal
but it wasn't
and that's it?
i don't even have a chance to say anything?
the days we've went through
it's spinning in my mind
why can't we just get over it?
i don't understand . really .